I’ll move to Florida, I’ll buy a brand new pick up truck, and I’ll tint all the windows, including the driver’s side
Gotcha!!! (not actually going to tint the driver’s side)
I now live in Yolo County permanently, and am be offering occasional outcalls to those who can pass my screening and I see to be a good match.
Priority clients include:
repeat clients
people who are screened*
people willing to send me all screening info via text *
meets any of the above and is also subscriber = bonus points (see link)
*And passes 😉
Have you ever wanted to visit Poundtown? (not the grocery chain in the UK) Now is your chance! *pulls crank*
Persona: My name is Anna, I’m kind of awkward, but make up for it with a serious obsession with ska, mad Taylor Swift cosplay skills, and a Linux distro that you have never heard. I spend nearly 100% of my day writing code and arguing with my computers, but some of those percents are spent looking for company — either from you or ChatGPT.
I offer an authentic experience that with stick with you for years to come. Nobody has had a disappointing experience with me, and most people have had what they call an “11 out of 10” experience with me, so statistically speaking there isn’t a whole lot that can go wrong.
Not ready to meet me but wanna see more? Unfortunately, in order to keep up my public real-life reputation separate from here I must keep my pics here a bit ambiguous. However, there are other locations on the web that can satisfy that urge if ya know what I mean.
To book, please send the following:
Age
Appearance/Ethnicity
PD Handle (with verified reviews from reputable providers) and/or work verification
Occupation
I will not respond to new messages outside of my contacts that do not include the screening information
I am text-only and will ignore phone calls
Do you find my screening process problematic? Well then you should see my problembasement! (drum sounds) Wanna get on my good side? HMU via the link in my IG bio.
Will we be a good match? The JavaScript function below can help you find out.
var determineIfDumbass = function (name, message, screeningInfo, trustedProviderContactInfo) {
let datGuy = name;
let datMessage = message;
let datInfo = screeningInfo;
let datReference = trustedProviderContactInfo;
function asksForBBFS(datMessage) {
if (datMessage.includes( “hey I’m a fucking idiot do u do bbfs babe I swear I don’t hav the std sweatie”)) {
return true;
}
return false;
}
function sendMessage(datReference) {
datReference = Boolean(Math.round(Math.random()));
return datReference;
}
function askReferences(datGuy, datReference) {
if (sendMessage(datReference) === false || typeof datGuy !== “string”) {
return false;
}
return true;
}
function passesScreening(datInfo) {
if (!datInfo && !!askReferences(datGuy, datReference)) {
return false;
}
return true;
}
if (!asksForBBFS(datMessage) && passesScreening(datInfo)) {
return “Anna might see you, but is extremely busy with work so doesn’t often have time 4 meetups plz forgive”;
} else {
return “get bent!”;
}
};
Donations
Discounted rates for active subscribers only (see link tree)
GFE
15min: $400
30min: $600
60min: $900
90min: $1000
120min: $1100
Deposit required to book. Alternative rates for: non-GFE, massage me discount, filming add-on, beer/concert/etc dates
Payment Types
Cash, CashApp, Credit/Debit Card, Venmo, Paypal, Zelle, Apple Pay, Google Wallet, Bitcoin, Ethereum, Litecoin
No List
FIV, Greek, FOV, CIM, COF, DATY
My Details
Age: 29
Breast Size: 33 – 35 C
Availablity: Outcall
